Understanding Homosexuality

This topic can be really hard to discuss sometimes because it is very touchy. I am just writing some facts I found really important and also intriguing in my readings this week.

Social-learning theories explain how needs for attention and affection get mixed up with sexuality when sexual abuse occurs.

Using a nonclinical population, Tomeo, Templer, Anderson, and Kotler found that 46 percent of gay men and 22 percent of lesbians were sexually abused as children, compared to 7 percent of the matched heterosexual men and 1 percent of the matched heterosexual women. Particularly intriguing was the finding that 68 percent of the homosexual men and 38 percent of the lesbians did not self-identify as gay or lesbian until after the molestation.33
M. E. Tomeo, D. I. Templer, S. Anderson, and D. Kotler. “Comparative Data of Childhood and Adolescence Molestation in Heterosexual and Homosexual Persons,” Archives of Sexual Behavior 30, no. 5 (2001): 535–41.

This does not mean that if you were sexually abused as a child you will be homosexual or anything, it just means it can create gender confusion which makes you vulnerable to many challenges, among them homosexuality.

Sexual attractions may not be chosen, but responses to those attractions do involve choice.

Unbidden attractions may come because of situational factors and prior sexual experiences. There may even be some kind of biological predisposition that makes such attractions more probable than not. But these attractions may be increased or decreased by the choices that people make.

Story
In 2000, the American Psychiatric Association was set to ban reorientation therapy. During their meeting in Chicago, the convention goers were greeted by busloads of evangelical Christians protesting this attempt to ban such care. Spitzer (along with the current author) met with some of the protestors, and Spitzer found their stories of change to be credible and decided that he would do a study to see if indeed homosexuality was fixed in all individuals. Though skeptical, Spitzer conducted his research and was surprised at the results. He found that 66 percent of the men and 44 percent of the women had achieved good heterosexual functioning. He also concluded that after reorientation therapy 89 percent of the men and 95 percent of the women were bothered only slightly or not at all by unwanted homosexual attractions. And contrary to the assertions by some that reorientation therapy was harmful, he did not find this to be the case at all. In fact, many of the participants in his study were depressed when they began psychological care. Virtually none were depressed at the termination of the care. Spitzer concluded that changes were made not just in behavior but in core features of sexual orientation, including attraction and fantasy.51
R. L. Spitzer, “Can Some Gay Men and Lesbians Change Their Sexual Orientation? 200 Participants Reporting a Change from Homosexual to Heterosexual Orientation,” Archives of Sexual Behavior 32, no. 5 (Oct. 2003): 403–17.

Everything I've quoted is from "Understanding Same Sex Attraction: Where to turn and how to help" Ch. 8 Written by Dean Byrd, PhD, MBA, MPH.

A psychologist, Gloria Steinham, said, "We desperately need to raise our boys a lot more like our girls."

AGREE?

I don't. I think we've been given certain talents and roles as male and female and it's supposed to be like that. I'm not saying when it comes to raising a family guys and girls should only do certain things. For example I think it's very important for both to be helpful towards each other. Meaning, women don't just have to do all the dishes and cleaning and raising the children. The men should help. However in the Proclamation: The Family it says that women were made to be nurturing and men were made to preside, protect, and provide. We were given specific roles in this sense.

In class we wrote down differences in male and females. For example generally speaking females are more emotional, observant, and have better verbal skills. Males on the other hand are more protective, aggressive, and have a one track focus. This is because women have 5x more connective tissue in their brains. They are able to go from one thing to the next and see a bunch of different things. Men have more gray matter. They did MRI's of male and female and showed them a picture of something while they were doing the test. In men, only one part of the brain lit up, and it was very very bright. That's where all of the focus was and there was hardly any activity anywhere else. The same picture was shown to the women and although part of their brain lit up in that same area, it wasn't nearly as bright and there were other parts of the brain lit up also. This is showing that when men focus on something, that is where the sole focus is. When women focus on something however, they can still think about other things. Interesting huh? In doing this though our teacher told us that usually guys who act more like the female characteristics we've stated are usually labeled as gay by society. If a girl acts more like the characteristics of men, they are just labeled as a tom-boy, but usually we get a lot more meaner in a way when men have more female characteristics. The way we react can greatly influence whether a male will identify himself as gay. Even if he didn't think he was, if he acts more like typical female characteristics, he might feel that way because of the way he's treated. It's unfair really.

Brother Williams at the end of class said something really profound to me. He said;

"It's not natural to have SUCH different personalities come together and live peaceably... it's DIVINE."